Shane Brian Mickelsen

This is my older brother Shane. He has to be my best friend in the entire world! I wish that I had more time with him growing up, and I wish that I could go back in time and change the way that I would act towards him sometimes. He is my idol, and the perfect one. I wish that I had seen and understood that when I was younger. Shane is currently serving his mission in Italy! How awesome is he?? I can't wait to talk to him again over Christmas on Skype (Yay for technology!!) Shane is the most loving, understanding, hilarious older brother, and the best that I could ask for. Even when I thought he was annoying he would pick me up in times I was lost and show me the indescribable love he had for me. How come back then I didn't see that he was really one of the only people that mattered in the end? Everything that I had in my life was so temporal and would not bring me happiness in the long run. I wish I didn't think of, or treat him the way I did. I wish that I had seen the love that he was trying his hardest to give me, and I wish I didn't push him away. Once the idea of him actually leaving me for two years hit me, I realized how much of an influence he was in my life, how much I needed him.

• When I was learning to speak- Shane was my voice
  
• When I was a dork- Shane was my partner in crime
  
• When Sam the evil cat cornered me in the kitchen- Shane came charging in the room with the broom
  
• When I thought that I couldn't- Shane showed me I could
  
• When I told him how I couldn't read well, and how I thought I was dumb- Shane put his arms around me and read to me Harry Potter and his favorite Titanic book through the late hours of the night.
  
• When I felt the need to dance- Shane choreographed "Ghostbusters" with me
  
• When we lost our Grandpa- Shane found me at the church and explained me to how everything would be ok.
  
• When I thought that I was a failing as an older sister- Shane comforted me and told me all my good qualities.
  
• When we felt the need to sing- Shane and I never felt the need to sing the correct lyrics "TOOTHPICK FIRE!"
  
• When we wrestled in my room for hours- Shane ducked and let me fly off the bed into the wall
  
• When I told him I was digging a tunnel into his room- Shane blueprinted the whole house to make sure we didn't run into any major pipe lines
  
• When I broke the Harry Potter tapes and told him I needed to run away from home so I wouldn't get in trouble- Shane followed me to make sure I didn't get too far.
  
• When he introduced me to his friends- Shane's face lit up with pride and said "This is my little sister Nadine"
  
• When I told him he was a dork for making videos of himself- He laughed and quacked like Donald Duck.
  
• When I had horrible friends-Shane told me. (Too bad I didn't feel the need to listen...)
  
• When I got in loads of trouble for my poor decisions and wasn't allowed to leave the house- Shane convinced my mom to let me go with him to HIS birthday party at a friends house. That night he treated me like the guest of  honor.
  
• When he moved away- (I got his room, bah haha) Shane would come home and light up the whole house.
  
• When he was away for long periods at a time- Shane would send me texts telling me how much he loved me and how beautiful he thinks I am.
  
• When he got his mission call- Shane was excited! But told me his true feelings of fear
  
• When it truly hit me that Shane was leaving for the other side of the world- I cried and couldn't feel the happiness that came with him serving the lord. Shane cried with me and told me everything was going to be ok.
  
• When we took him out for dinner before he left- Shane smiled as we all went around the table and said everything that we loved about him. When I couldn't get my words to come out to try and explain what he meant to me, he put his hand on my knee and looked at me with those understanding eyes as if he already knew everything I was going to say.
  
• When Shane held my hand on the way home from his missionary ordination- Every memory we shared together ran through our minds. We didn't have to say anything to each other, but through holding his hand all of his love for me was silently spoken. 

Shane can't be with me every day now, but whenever I have a hard day all I have to do is look back at any memory of him and that love he has floods my mind. God knew I needed an older brother like him, and I can't thank him enough for sending me Shane. None of us are perfect, and Shane showed me that even though we are all full of imperfectness, we can be truly loved for who we are. Shane I love you, and can't wait until June when I will see your face and give you the biggest hug I can and show you the love that you have always given me. 

ps-This is what i posted on Shane's wall today :)

Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again

So I was listening to this song... and i was like oooh, it is how i feel about Shane :( and so then i got this crazy idea that if i went around a graveyard singing this song and stopped at a really big gravestone maybe your voice would come out from behind it and we could sing together. Well probably needless to say, that didn't work... and all the people in the cemetery just gave me this look like they were debating calling the mental institution hotline... So i got out of there as quickly as i could. There wasn't even an extremely hot sword fight between two lovers of mine. So i was very disappointed.